Misery defined: “a state or feeling of great stress or discomfort of mind or body; a cause or source of great distress or discomfort.”  (dictionary.com)   At some time in everyone’s life, misery arises and imposes a crippling experience.  Usually, misery emanates from a myriad of self-imposed fears.  And when we encounter misery, we know that: 

— “Misery loves company”  (John Ray, English naturalist (1627–1705.)  

But does it have to be that way?  Miserable people adopt a “woe is me” attitude, and need to discuss it with someone; i.e., company, most likely a confident or loved one.  Consider three more quotes:

—  “Misery loves company, but company does not reciprocate.”  Addison Mizner, American architect (1872—1933)

—  “If misery loves company, misery has company enough.”  Henry David Thoreau, American philosopher (1817— 1862  )

—  “Misery no longer loves company.  Nowadays it insists on it.”  Russel Baker, American newspaperman and Pulitzer Prize author (b1925)  

How does one rid ourselves from misery, in ourselves and others? A psychologist opines that a person can avoid misery through a technique called simply, “avoidance.”  For example, if you are out of shape, avoid exercise so you will not be reminded of your poor physical condition; if you have a personal conflict, avoid that person and the conflict will vanish; if you feel anxious about attending parties populated with unknown people, stay home and you will avoid the anxiety it brings. (How to Stop the Number One Cause of Most Human Misery by Jim Fazio with Ronald Siegal, PsyD, www.jimfazio.com)  

Though the avoidance scheme may work temporarily to avoid misery, it certainly is not the best long term approach.  Perhaps, confronting the misery source toward overcoming or eliminating the problem may be a better objective.  If possible, instead of problem avoidance try self-preoccupation avoidance — thinking outwardly instead of inwardly.  Just take a few deep breaths, and give it a whirl.  In short, do the thing you fear, as prescribed by Emerson. 

—“Do the thing you fear and the death of fear is certain.” Ralph Waldo Emerson, American philosopher  (1803—1882)      

Though easier said than done, if misery can avoid “avoidance,” misery will no longer need to love company. 

When researching what to do for fun, one may consider checking out the seven deadly sins, also known as the Capital Sins, for potential opportunities.  Sins, of course, remain taboo and could adversely affect one’s best welfare; but we all know that “to err is human,” so lets examine each in turn.  To avoid pitching any favorites, I will list them in alphabetical order: Anger, Envy, Gluttony, Greed, Lust, Pride, and Sloth.  Look them over, and see if any pique your interest.

For one seeking fun, however, we can immediately strike three from the list for failing to yield some pleasure.  

— Anger is unpleasant, not only for the actor, but for everyone around.  

— Envy causes us internal grief because someone else enjoys some thing or some person unavailable to us.  No fun here!  

— Sloth entails total laziness, a bump on a log, which may be attractive for a short time, as in situations when one is overworked or devoid of leisure time; but overall, it contributes little to one’s happiness and ultimately impinges unfavorably on one’s self worth.  

Accordingly, after removing three of the capital sins for an insufficient pleasure attraction, we can divide the four remaining into two couplets:  

— Pride and Greed entice the ego and bank account, respectively; one causing an internal glow about how important or wonderful one is; the other causing an accumulation of wealth, presumably more than we need and mostly at the expense of others.  Though these may evoke some pleasure, pride makes one a bore; greed, a miser, which is one letter away from misery.  Thus, we have struck down five, with one couplet remaining.  

— Lust and Gluttony appeal to the human senses, and consequently may qualify as the most popular, evoking the notorious Bacchanalian precept: “Eat, Drink and be Merry,” an attractive lure for pleasure seekers. 

A careful examination, therefore, elevates Lust and Gluttony to the top of the list.  If that makes you angry because you are envious of a self absorbed roué’, sit on it in sloth.  It’s nothing to be proud about, and will not add a farthing to your assets.  In addition, pleasurable participation yields an important bonus:  limiting ones sinful activities to Lust and Gluttony avoids having to atone for 71.4% (5/7) of the Capital Sins.