An epitaph is defined as: “An inscription on or at a tomb or a grave in memory of the one buried there; a brief statement commemorating or epitomizing a deceased person or something past.” (Merriam-Webster Dictionary.) Many famous people sought to craft a pithy epitaph in their memory with specific instructions in their last wishes. Some notable epitaphs follow:

— “Free at Last,” the final words of the famous civil rights leader, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr, who led the Civil Rights Movement in the 1960’s, striving to bring real freedom to his people, descendants of former slaves. His assassination shook the country; his epitaph left a compelling message. Everyone attains freedom and equality in death.

— “Excuse my Dust,” a humorous epitaph of Dorthy Parker (1893-1967), a American poet, short story writer, and satirist. She founded the notorious Algonquin Round Table, which hosted a celebrated group of New York writers who met for lunch each day at the Algonquin Hotel. They engaged in “wise cracks, wordplay and witticisms” that found its way in various newspaper columns of the attendees. (Wikipedia, Algonquin Round Table.) Her epitaph fit the spirit of her wit.

— “Come up and see me some time,” a typical quip of Mae West, the actress, comedian and sex symbol. Mae West performed a song entitled” Come up and see me sometime”, which she may have referenced in one of her acts, luring potential suitors into her web of decadence.

— “Here lies W.C. Fields. I’d rather be living in Philadelphia.” The comedian, W.C Fields, grew up poor in Philadelphia and cracked many a joke about the city. He often referred to variations of the epitaph in one of his routines from which the quote arose. In reality, however, his grave marker merely notes his name and dates. Nevertheless, popular lore retains the memorable epitaph, though not above his grave site.

— “I’m in on a plot.” Another double entendre, identifying the resting place of Alfred Hitchcock, and his recognized brilliance on developing the plots for his movie and Television mysteries.

And what better than to end with the epitaph of Mel Blanc, the unique voice master of many cartoon characters, including Bugs Bunny, Daffy Duck, Porky Pig, Sylvester the cat, Tweety Bird, Yosemite Sam, et al., who ended every cartoon with a well known slogan and a befitting tribute to his life’s work enjoyed by millions:

— “That’s All Folks,”

August, the eighth month of the year, is named after the Roman emperor, Augustus Caesar (63 BCE—14AD.) It comprises the last month of Summer, and serves as a favorite vacation time for many people. If one were to ask: “What comes to mind when you think of August?”  Most folks would opine hot, humid, and the end of summer — not favorable terms.

In 1837 London, however, Charles Dickens (1812—1870) described the eighth month quite differently, with a fond remembrance:

“There is no month in the whole year, in which nature wears a more beautiful appearance than in the month of August. Spring has many beauties, and May is a fresh and blooming month, but the charms of this time of year are enhanced by their contrast with the winter season. August has no such advantage. It comes when we remember nothing but clear skies, green fields, and sweet-smelling flowers — when the recollection of snow, and ice, and bleak winds, has faded from our minds as completely as they have disappeared from the earth — and yet what a pleasant time it is! “ (The Pickwick Papers, chapter XVI by Charles Dickens, Oxford University Press.)

Understandably, the latitude of London sets 10 degrees north of New York City, so the summers should be shorter and less severe, and the winters more intolerable.

Dickens’ August reflection described a time when the earth was cooler. Today, we know and feel the “dog days” of August, a phrase describing the unbearable swelter on a hot, humid, windless day in midsummer. In Major League Baseball, the dog days refers to the time when strong, virile men wilt under the constant play and the penetrating heat. it’s like “hitting the wall” during a marathon, when the runner has drained his reservoir of strength, and must continue by burning muscle and bone.

The Gladiola, August’s official flower, captures the essence of late, sunny summer days, and represents remembrance, calm, integrity and infatuation. (The Old Farmer’s Almanac) For school children, August brings the last days of freedom, new school supplies, clothes and shoes, and reunion with school chums.

Lastly, August includes several special days. My favorite: August 21, National Senior Citizen Day, introduced by no less than a senior citizen, President Ronald Reagan, who issued a 1988 Proclamation to honor the contributions older citizens have made to home, family and society.

Following my previous posts on two favorite American aphorists, Mae West and Yogi Berra, I now move to Poland for additional thought provoking aphorisms. Stanislaw J. Lec (1909–1966), a Polish aphorist, poet, and an avowed communist, became notorious for his pithy observations, despite his unpopular political views. I quote a few below:

Human activity:

— “He who limps is still walking.”
— “Don’t trust the heart, it wants your blood.”
— “Youth is the gift of nature, but age is a work of art.”
— “The moment of recognizing your own lack of talent is a flash of genius.”
— “When you jump for joy, beware that no one moves the ground under your feet.”

Uncertainty:

— “Beyond each corner, new directions lie in wait.”
— “On the top of each peak your are on the edge of an abyss.”
— “Do not ask God the way to heaven; he will show you the hardest one.”
— “The first requisite for immortality is death.”

Political action:

— “In a war of ideas, it is the people who get killed.”
— “Is it progress if a cannibal uses a fork?”
— “No snowflake in an avalanche ever feels responsible.”
— “You can close your eyes to reality, but not to memories.”

Respecting the last quote, Lec experienced the reality of two World Wars, the Great Depression, and imprisonment within a German work camp, which suggests that few of his memories reached a happy plateau. Mostly, he worked as a writer for communist periodicals and participated in the communist movement, leading to his departure from Poland to escape government arrest before WW II. After German occupation, he returned to Poland to write many pro-Soviet pieces, including praise for Stalin, resulting in his imprisonment. After his second failed escape attempt, he was sentenced to death, but succeeded in his third attempt, reportedly killing his assigned executioner with the shovel he used while digging his own grave. (en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stanislaw_Jerzy_Lec)

Despite his tragic life story, he wrote many thoughtful aphorisms, including those above. He died young, before the Berlin Wall tumbled down.

Following my previous post, an aphorism collection of Mae West, I now turn to another famous American icon: Yogi Berra, known for his clever malaprop sayings, some of which he actually said. Most everyone can quote a favorite Yogi-ism; some of my favorites appear below:

He starred in a LITE beer commercial, which scored high on the ratings chart. Yogi, held up a can of LITE beer and said: “Everybody I know drinks LITE beer. And if they don’t — I don’t know them.” I wonder how many barrels of beer sold as a result of that quip.

Some keen observations:
— “You can observe a lot by just watching;”
— “It’s like deja vu all over again;”
— “It ain’t over until its over;”
— “The future ain’t what it used to be.”
— “Baseball is ninety percent mental, and the other half is physical.”

Some cogent advice:
— “When you come to a fork in the road, take it.”
— “Always go to people’s funerals, otherwise they won’t go to yours.”
— “Nobody goes there nowadays, it’s too crowded.”
— “Never answer an anonymous letter.”
— “If you don’t know where you are going, you may wind up someplace else.”

Some startling conclusions:
— “A nickel isn’t worth a dime anymore.”
— “We made too many wrong mistakes.”
— “Slump? I ain’t in no slump . . . I just ain’t hitting.”
— “You wouldn’t have won if we’d beaten you.”
— “It was impossible to get a conversation going, everybody was talking too much.”

Two perfectly clear instructions:
— “Pair up in threes.”
— “Cut the pizza in four pieces because I’m not hungry enough to eat six.”

And when asked about his many aphorisms, Yogi responded truthfully:
— “I never said most of the things I said.”

An aphorism is a terse saying embodying a general truth, or astute observation. (dictionary.com.)

American icon, Mae West (1893—1980) was an actress, comedian and sex symbol whose career spanned seven decades. She became famous for her bawdy, double entendres, producing a prodigious output of aphorisms to the delightful thrills of her audiences and to the fierce opposition of her censors. She voiced many aphorisms on timely subjects, like: history, fashion, love, choice, and even temptation. A sampling:

— “Men like women with a past, because they hope history will repeat itself.”

— “It is better to be looked over than to be overlooked.”

— “Love is what you make it, and who you make it with.”

— “When choosing between two evils, I always like to take the one I haven’t tried before.”

— “When I’m good, I’m very good; but when I’m bad, I’m better.”

— “When women go wrong, men go right after them.”

— “Lead me not into temptation, I can find the way myself.”

— “I generally resist temptation, unless I can’t resist it.”

Mae West encountered much opposition, particularly censorship, due to her seductive, suggestive comments, and even did some jail time for expressing her First Amendment right. True to character, she made light of her opposition: ”I believe in censorship. I made a fortune out of it.”

In the end, she amassed a large following, and became the largest box office attraction during the Depression. During Word War II, US servicemen added to her considerable fame by dubbing their yellow, inflatable life vests as “Mae West’s.” Suitably, I end this post with her epitaph:  “Come up and see me some time.”

The answer to the title question: a confusing lot. “Onym” is a word syllable stemming from an ancient Greek root, meaning “name,” which form parts of many English words, particularly those that describe unusual characteristics of some English words.

When writing and speaking, the “onym” syllable usually identifies words that share either the same spelling or sound while encompassing a different meaning. Confusing? Just wait until I explain. We all know and use synonyms (similar meaning) and antonyms (opposite meaning), but may not be familiar with other “onym” words. Consider a few:

Homonym: words that impart multiple meanings while sharing either the same sound or spelling; like, bare (naked)/bear (animal), fair (exhibition)/fair (just). We cannot stop here without first mentioning other homonym subcategories; namely:
— homophone, which describe words that sound alike with different spelling and meaning like aisle/ isle; here/hear;
— homographs, which describe words that spell alike, with different meaning, as bear (uphold)/bear (animal)
— heteronym which classifies words that share the same spelling, but have different sounds and meanings, like close (shut) and close (near)

Oronym: phrases that sound the same, but differ in spelling and meaning, like: Gray day or Grade A; stuffy nose or stuff he knows.

Capitonym: words that spell or sound the same, but differ in that one word carries an initial letter capital; like, Polish (nationality) and polish (shine); Turkey (nation) and turkey (bird).

Paronym: words that are “similar”, not necessarily identical, but contain a significantly different spelling, like accept/except, addition/edition

Acronym: an abbreviation using the initial letters of each word in a phrase; like Scuba (Self Contained Underwater Breathing Apparatus) or Nato (North American Treaty Organization.)

Contronym: a word having two meanings that contradict one another, like sanction, which may mean to approve or to boycott; moot, which may mean a debatable point or a point not worth debating.

Conclusion: An onym by any other name may qualify as a pseudonym.